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Supreme Court says Flatulence Protected by First Amendment

Submitted by editor on Sat, 10/03/2020 - 16:41
Supreme Court of the United States

The Supreme Court of the United States ruled Tuesday that Flatulence is protected by the First Amendment to the United States Constitution.

In a five-to-four ruling, Chief Justice Roberts read the long-winded ruling in the House of Congress press room.

Some senators appeared relieved at the ruling. Senator Joe Lieberman expressed satisfaction that he personally would feel more comfortable during those long afternoon ramblings by the Speaker of the House, especially when he had consumed one of his favorite Reuben sandwiches for lunch. Lieberman leaned to one side and appeared to "let one rip" as he grinned for the cameras. "I'm looking forward to our next filibuster", Lieberman said. "And I'm looking forward to going back to my favorite Mexican Burrito restaurant on Pennsylvania Avenue".

"Finally, I can relax and be myself", Lieberman said with some degree of smugness. "I am happy that the American People will enjoy this new priviledge today and into the future".

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